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 Angel of Shadow |
II.22. acrostic #2 |
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Posts: 615 04/18/09 10:36:16 |
Crayons lay sleeping, at her side Open, just enough to Let the rainbow in. Often pressed to paper in sweeping strokes, Unusual designs, unique, Richly deserving of Mother's Full attention, though, that was never Understood. It seemed her shade of Love was never bright enough...to matter. |
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janders07 |
#1 | |||
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Posts: 149 05/10/09 20:11:04 |
wow, you sneaked up on me there. the simplicity of your opening, the superficially cheerful nature of the acrostic (colourful), shredded on failed childhood
longings. great writing, sash. you might like to think of losing some of the commas, and i don't think you need the last two words. finishing on
'bright enough' is pretty powerful.
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